You wander outside toward your car pondering questions. What do you want to DO? Who do you want to BE? What do you want to do with your LIFE? What are your GOALS? Luckily, it is the first day of your last SPRING BREAK and you have plenty of time to think about these important questions. You get in your car and begin to drive home.
You arrive at your house with some answers. Of course, you don’t figure out the final answer, but you suppose that in time it will come. For now, your GOALS are:
These things sound easy, but then again, this is LIFE.
Please enter a command.
>observe pixels more closely_
You enhance the pixels by 1000%, allowing you to OBSERVE them more closely in all their pixelated goodness. The show that is on the television becomes painfully clear. So painfully clear that you sort of wish you had sun glasses that could make the image less high in definition.
However, as BEAUTIFUL as the image has become, you are no closer to accomplishing your GOAL. In fact, what is your GOAL? Wait, what’re we doing here?
Please enter a command.
You restart your game from your last SAVE POINT, sitting at your DESK in your ROOM. Your television is on, displaying PIXELS.
From here you can input any command. Please submit a command.
RULES UPDATED. AMENDMENTS ARE BOLD.
RULES are simple laws that take place within the game of LIFE. These laws cannot be broken. Literally. Just try.
RULES apply to submitting commands and should be understood to avoid TEARS and DISCOMFORT.
- PLAYERS must submit commands using the prompt provided. Good luck doing otherwise!
- PLAYERS must submit commands in the proper format. The format is GREATER THAN; COMMAND; UNDERSCORE (>command_).
- PLAYERS’ commands will not always be accepted for a few reasons. Some of these reasons include STUPIDITY, ILLEGALITY, or REPEATIVITY. PLAYERS are free to try any command, but should expect NO REACTION if the command is not accepted.
- PLAYERS may submit QUESTIONS to the MAIN CHARACTER by submitting commands without the correct prompt. QUESTIONS will be answered in private only and thus require a TUMBLOID ACCOUNT.
- PLAYERS’ commands will never be publicly posted. Prompts will be responded with either “COMMAND ACCEPTED” or “COMMAND DENIED: <reason>” to inform PLAYERS of their progress.
For further information, type READ ABOUT into the prompt.
OTHERWISE, type START GAME.
-Removed Anonymous submissions to ensure players receive feedback to their prompts
-Removed posting who submits a command in to the main character
-Increased graphics to glorious 500p
%Working on native prompt
Please read updated rules to proceed
ERROR. CURRENT COMMAND WAS RECEIVED WITH ERROR. PLEASE LOOK OVER THE RULES TO UNDERSTAND THIS. CODE 4005
The PAUSE MENU loads normally despite your faulty ANON command. You look around at all the options available to you at this time with both AMAZEMENT and BOREDOM. You’re especially interested in the UPDATE option, as you are convinced the current version of this GAME SUCKS.
You press START, which ironically STOPS everything. You’ve always wondered why they call it the START button, anyway. Most games don’t even need to you press it. Of course, this one did.
The START MENU allows you to access the options. Would you like to explore the options?